Online Dating Safety Tips

Choosing an online dating provider

• Do your homework. Your dating experience begins with your choice of dating website.
   
• There are many providers out there so take a look at their website, speak to others who have had positive experiences and read the privacy policy and terms and conditions of any websites you are interested in. No website will be perfect, so always use common sense.
   
• Use an online dating agency that prioritises the safety of its members.

Creating a profile

• Guard your anonymity. When creating a profile name, choose one that does not reveal any personal details. Create a 'nickname' that is used only for dating websites and avoid using any part of your real name.
   
• Do not disclose any personal information such as your last name, address, workplace, phone number, personal email address or other identifying information.
   
• Do not post pictures of any children or grandchildren. Think about choosing a photo to represent yourself that does not reveal personal details or other identifying information, e.g. a shirt or cap with a workplace logo.

First contact

• Ask for a recent photograph. Appearance can help determine, whether someone is the type of person you would want to correspond with. It is very easy to deceive online so don’t assume that the person pictured is a true and accurate representation.
   
• Ask for a number of recent photographs in a variety of settings. If the person makes excuses or gets upset at this request – perhaps it is best to quit now.
   
• Take it slowly. If you make a connection with someone online, spend time getting to know them by email in the first instance.
   
• Ensure you create an email address that is different from your personal one through a web-based email service such as Gmail, Yahoo or Hotmail and make sure you do not have an email signature activated.
   
• Keep a record of all correspondence and be wary of any inconsistencies. If someone is not genuine, it will be difficult to keep up the façade over time.
   
• If email contact is going well and you wish to move things further, arrange time to speak over the phone. In this situation use a mobile or public phone number, as opposed to your landline. You may wish to block your number initially, to do this: dial 0197 before entering their number. Your call will appear as "Private Number" with no digits on a caller display.
   
• Speaking over the phone will reveal much about the person’s communication style and their social skills. Remain vague initially and take your time in disclosing information about yourself. If asked about where you work or where you live a possible response might be ‘I work in communications’, or ‘I live in a small country town’. This will allow the other person to learn a little more about you without revealing too much detail.
   
• If the conversation feels difficult or you are pressured in any way to reveal information that makes you feel uncomfortable, consider whether you really want to keep in touch.

First meeting

• Meet in a public place. You have chatted online, had several telephone conversations and think it is time to move to the next level. When arranging a time to meet, ensure you meet in a public place such as a restaurant at a busy time.
   
• Be sure to tell a friend the details of where you will be and what time you plan to return. Give them the contact details of the person you are meeting and perhaps ask them to call you a couple of times during the date to check in.
   
• Verify their identification. Check that the person is who they have said they are by asking to see their driver’s license or a similar reputable photo ID.
   
• Take you own transportation to and from the date and leave independently at the end. Never accept an invitation to be picked up or dropped home.

Think...

• Never give any financial details; including account numbers, wage/salary details, savings, investments, bank or credit card details to a potential date
   
• Remain anonymous for as long as is practicable
   
• Take your time
   
• Trust your instincts
   
• Keep a trusted friend informed of your dating activities
   
• Beware of people who become too intimate or sexual too quickly
   
• Never do anything you feel unsure about. If you feel uncomfortable with a situation get out as soon as you can and tell someone. If someone is abusing a service, inform the agency directly. Your safety is paramount and should never be jeopardized.

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